Which Is More Important, The Marriage Proposal Or The Marriage Proper?

Every woman wants to have a dream marriage proposal and wedding. This dream proposal doesn't necessarily mean it'll be grand but let it be as the woman envisioned it. They talk about this often. How often do you ever hear women talk about having a dream marriage? Just be honest with your answer whether you are a man or woman. That brings me to the question; “Which is more important, the marriage proposal or the marriage proper?” The proposal to me is the destination of few weeks, months or years dating/courtship journey while marriage is a lifelong journey. But with the invention of the device called divorce, marriage can last a few hours.

“Which is more important, the marriage proposal or the marriage proper?”

I have often wondered which is more important. The question can be likened to a similar question like “which is more important the journey or the destination?” This is a million dollar question which we will try to answer. Is there even an objective way to answer this question? Opinions differ for sure. A few women I discussed this with all said marriage proposal is important and needs to be a very romantic and memorable. I quite agree with them. BUT none of them was able to categorically say, yes marriage proposal is more important than marriage itself and vice versa. Is it me or is it just the way God wired women?

I can categorically tell you anytime any day that marriage is more important than marriage proposal. Maybe that’s how me or men are wired. Marriage is a long term journey and the proposal is a few minutes event. I don't know about you, as for me;

"I Rather Have A Shitty Marriage Proposal And Have A Blissful Marriage Than A Blissful Marriage Proposal And Shitty Marriage" - Scopium NwabuKing

Some People Take The Proposal More Seriously Than The Wedding Vows

It is so wrong to do so. With divorce rate soon to overtake rate of marriage, one wonders what really pushed the couples to get married. That entire perfect dream proposal lasted only a few years of wedding anniversaries, are you kidding me?

What is the essence of a dream marriage proposal if the marriage is only going to last a few weeks? Then the woman may as well just pick out a ring while the man watches a football match. Yeah I know you'll say nobody goes into a marriage hoping for it to fall apart few years down the line. It falls apart because priorities are misplaced. The less important event is treated as the most important. And the most important journey is relegated to the background.

I'm not saying that marriage proposals aren’t essential. Like I said before They are important. They can serve as a great jumping off point for the sometimes grueling process of planning a wedding. Honestly, creative proposals are the best. The kind when the guy proposes in a way that is romantically meaningful and unique to the couple.

Does It Really Matter How A Man Proposes To A Woman?

Are there women who would turn down marriage or be genuinely upset if he didn’t propose the “right” way? If so what is the "right" way? Are there women who would say yes to a boyfriend she didn’t necessarily want to marry simply because he asked in a stunning fashion? I wonder what single women including you reading this have in mind as their “dream proposal” and what happens if the reality is nothing like they dreamt?

If you have dated this person for some time and you still don’t know each other very well as to make a bad proposal, what else do you know well about your future spouse? What else can your future spouse do well?

According to a marriage proposal study;

One in four brides hated the way their future husband proposed. Twenty-six per cent of brides-to-be said that they wished the moment had been more romantic, original or personal. Others would have preferred it to be more private or complained that it was too over-the-top special, and a third said that the biggest faux pas was proposing without a ring.

I totally agree with the women on proposing without a ring, how dumb is that? How can you not propose with the engagement ring?

Listed Below Is A Few DON’TS About Marriage Proposal

Don’t Propose Empty-Handed

Don't Propose Too Early in the Relationship

Don't Make it Public Or In Front of an Audience

Don't Hide the Engagement Ring in Food

Don't Propose at a Sports Game

Don't Do it in Front of Her Family

Don't Make it Too Complicated

Don't Expect Her to Say Yes Immediately

Don’t Do It At The Wrong Moment

Most Nigerian single women want their single Nigerian men to shower western version of love on them especially when it comes to marriage proposal but they still retain core African attitude towards some of western romantic gestures. For instance an average Nigerian woman will never value being bought flowers fresh or plastic. Their spoken or unspoken sentiment is; ''na flower I go chop?'' meaning 'Is it flower that I will eat?' Or something like; ''Do I look like a goat wey dey eat grass to you?''

A simple, romantic but not over-the-top proposal is necessary, please always remember it is not the end itself. It's a means to achieving an end. There are a few tips to bear in mind for the great marriage proposal.

Listed Below Is A Few DOS Of Marriage Proposal

Do Find The Right Engagement Ring

Do Test the Waters

Do Make it a Surprise

Do Be Prepared

Do Pick A Memorable/Personal Spot

Do Be Creative

Do Drop to One Knee

Do Tell Her Why You Want to Marry Her

I have seen a lot proposal failures and I think to myself does it really worth it? Dude please save yourself the misery and just keep it simply simple

It is very possible to have both a shitty marriage proposal and a shitty marriage or have both a blissful marriage proposal and a blissful marriage. No problem if you end with the latter. If you can have best of both worlds that is awesome. That's my desire for everyone. But if you must have one at cost of the other, please it has to be the long term journey which is The Marriage and not the short term destination which is The Marriage Proposal. It is important you don't let your marriage last as long as your grand spectacular dream marriage proposal. 

That's my opinion on this, I would love to hear yours and learn from you. Let me know what you think via the comment box.